Dear Diary,

Yeah, I am definitely gonna have to go pay Hades a visit. Which is not a sentence I ever thought I'd say two years ago. Shit, a year ago I would have maybe been thinking about asking him about sending my Worshippers to his realm on the up and up rather than having Marie sneak them in on the down low. Six months ago I'd have been wondering about whether he wanted a nice skylight to surprise Persephone with. But here and now I'm in no mood to make things a friendly visit.

Seriously, there are like three reasons Hades of all people wouldn't be on the list of 'Gods who need to be Made Dead'. He's got no real stories about him being an abusive rapist. He's a happily married dude with a dog named Spot and a job. His job as Lord of the Underworld and Warden of Tartarus has gone so stunningly well that 'Zombie apocalypse' isn't even a genre of fiction here and now, and the Titans are just not even a meaningful force. So a sudden influx of Titans heading toward Atlantis with marauding as the only thing on their admittedly broken minds is concerning to say the least.

Given what I know of the dude, the most likely scenarios are somebody sneaking in behind his back or one of his brothers convincing him that I'm the Sealed Evil In A Can that somebody let out of the can. Which is totally not the case. It was a chest, not a can, and I spent a whole fuckin' Season tryna convince myself that I am not nor was I ever the villain. Considering I spent a not inconsiderable part of a subsequent Season getting my rocks off to the taste and thought of the grit my Kitten licked off my thighs post Ericson, I cannot with absolute confidence say I'm not the villain, or evil, but I sure as shit can say that I have at least tried to put some fuckin' thought into how to be a better Deity than most of the ones available here and now.

Considering that my head-of-Pantheon competition include a dude who put the God of Justice's sword hand down Fenrir's throat to save his own fuckin' ass, and a dude whose only thoughts are putting his cock into any vajayjay that catches his attention irrelevant of Consent, that's not a real high bar. I understand that. I also try every day to be better than I was yesterday. Given that I am, apparently, immortal, eventually if I keep doing that, even if I backslide now and then, I ought to be able to hit a nominally non-villainous level of morality before I die.

So yesterday, after a kind of surprising conversation with Tallulah about her integration into our family, I stared at the horizon until the sun set. Ladies, I believe it best if we set watches tonight.

I can keep watch, I replied immediately.

You can, Champion, but the more you spread yourself out, the less attentive each of you becomes.

I Don't. replied Marie.

Saffron did not sound exactly happy, but acquiesced with a simple, let it be so.

That's when I looked up and realized something. Not quite knowing how to get in touch with Diana otherwise, I stepped off the West Tower down to the bedroom. "Menace?"

"Yeth, Mama?"

"Can you call Diana over here for me?"

A short while later she arrived in a glare of moonlight. "Matriarch."

I nodded, then stepped over to greet her with a hug. If she seemed surprised, she didn't seem upset. When I stepped back, I sighed and said, "yeah, I don't think I can do the Revel tonight."

"I understand."

"Can you fill in for me?"

Yeah, she looked a little blindsided by that. "But... your High Priestess will not be there?"

I shook my head. "Nope. Not asking you to do anything you wouldn't do for your people. Just... Maybe show up, listen to what they need, help them out if you can, let them know I'm not ignoring them or forgot them, I'm just stuck in the fuckin' ocean waiting for whatever fucked up thing is coming next?"

She nodded. "Of course, Matriarch. I will look after your people as well as mine in this time of tribulation."

I hugged her again. "Thanks." Then I stepped back to the top of the West Tower.

So Marie stood watch through the night on the Worshipping, Questing, and Plundering, while Karen slept on the Questing and Madeline on the Plundering. I stayed atop the Black Dragon's mast, and put another of me each watching over Saffron on the Seeking and Tallulah on the Training.

Nothing. Nothing all night long, save looking at the stars. The ladies in my Maw sang hymns, but not from the Doctrine. I guess they figured hitting me with a crippling level of orgasm overload wasn't the best idea when we might get hit with a Titan any moment. Still fed me some power via Worship, though.

Midway through the night, Marie joined me atop the masts, her arms slipping around me, her chest warm against the back of my head. It wasn't really super cold yet, but it was kinda chilly, especially on the Seeking, which was the second northernmost of our Tentacles, and the northernmost I had one of me on. I did the same, joining her on the other three Tentacles, and we stood there like that, keeping each other warm and maybe just a touch more alert until sunrise.

Which is when, as the ladies disappeared one at a time from my Maw, I saw a speck low in the sky against the rising sun. "What's that?"

Marie leaned forward, shading her eyes with one outstretched claw. After a few moments, she twitched a little and said, "Bird."

I squinted a little. "A bird? It... It just came over the horizon."

"Big Bird."

I couldn't help it, I snorted, laughed, and tumbled off the fuckin' mast of the Worshipping. I collapsed back to myself and Co-Located back to her side, still chuckling. "Okay, how fast is it coming at us."

She shrugged. "Not." At my questioning glance, she said, "Headwind."

Hey Kitten, should I see if I can bring the Black Dragon north?

After a moment, she replied, no. Engage that avian Titan as you need to, and get to the boiler room of the Black Dragon, but we know there's more than one of them out there.

You got it, Kitten. I collapsed all of me except the ones at the West Tower and the masts of the Worshipping Tentacle and the Black Dragon, then hopped down to the Dragon's deck and ran for the boiler rooms. Aboard the Worshipping, I half turned to Marie and said, "stay on station. I'm gonna go see if I can talk to that thing."

"Be Careful."

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"Never am." With that I Translocated toward the thing. Two hops later I settled into an Air Shield box, kinda stunned speechless by the fact that the thing literally blotted out the sun from this angle. I wasn't sure if it hadn't noticed me yet or just didn't give a shit about something smaller than its... anything. Seriously, it wasn't as big as the previous Titan, but holy shit it was still big as fuck. It had that huge wingspan and relatively small body I expected to see in seabirds, the kind that spent most of their time gliding over the ocean. Its beak and claws were pure raptor though.

I sighed as it closed the gap, the wind from behind me blowing my hair into my face, making it hard to concentrate. "Fuck it." I fired up the PA Spell, then called out, "hey there! My name's Tabitha Diaz! I'd like to..."

I never got to say what I wanted to do, because with a few powerful flaps of its wings, it shot up into the sky, then pulled them in and dove straight for me. At the last minute, I Translocated straight up, and it shot right through where my Air Shields had been. If they slowed it at all, I didn't notice, although a faint 'piff' echoed through the sky, kinda like an air rifle going off. I didn't really get a chance to make a new plan, because apparently it spotted me behind it and did some fancy aerobatics to get itself back up high enough to dive at me again, this time with a tailwind. As I fell I translocated into a new Air Shield Box above and behind it, pushing my Blend up as I did. It screamed lashed out, and I Translocated behind it as its beak crushed my box.

The Air Shield Box, just to be clear. Weirdest thing, I'd Translocated to a spot I could see it's eye clearly, but it didn't come for me until I popped out another Air Shield to land on. I leapt back to the Worshipping Tentacle, at which point I realized that our running battle had moved us noticeably closer to the coast. The size of the thing just fucked with my sense of scale. I turned to Marie, poking Saffron with my brain as I did. "That thing can spot my Air Shields even when I'm Blended."

It likely has great affinity with the air, and is simply attacking any disturbances nearby.

"Yeah, that's great and all, but..." I looked up. It had leveled back out and was heading toward the coast again. Okay, it looked an awful lot like it had altered course just a little bit to head straight for the Worshipping. "How am I supposed to fight it in the air without someplace to stand?"

Marie just shrugged and said, "Tentacles."

Yeah, it took me a second. "Ah, shit. This is gonna suck. Do you know how heavy I am?"

A moment later she hoisted me up from behind. Grinning at me, she said, "Not Very."

"Smart ass." Before I could say anything else, she Translocated us both into the air in front of the thing. It did its 'climb and dive' routine, but my whole attention was on getting a tentacle around Marie to hold her up. Weirdest fuckin' thing, while Marie was way heavier than she should have been, she felt light compared to tryna hold myself in the air with a tentacle. I yoinked us out of the way at the last second, lashing out with another tentacle to grab the thing.

Unfortunately, it wasn't anything like as clumsy as a Titanic Jersey pigeon should have been. It rolled out of the way, then climbed when I reached for it again. Over and over I lashed out, and over and over it evaded. Every few attempts the fucker even lashed out with its beak or talons, leaving big bleeding welts on my tentacles. Worse, with each exchange it moved closer to the coastline, closer to the Worshipping Tentacle. Yeah, I get it, warship, more or less, but I still didn't want it fighting something that could turn it to matchsticks without hardly trying.

Then, as it juked around my most recent attempt to grab it, the thing rolled left when I thought it would need to roll right, and basically backhanded Marie and I straight down into the fuckin' ocean. While neither of us were technically Mortal, and both of us have pretty decent Endurance even for Deific types, that was not a survivable situation. We saw the impact from where we stood on the Worshipping's deck.

"Fuck this noise." Kitten? Vulcan?

A moment later she arrived, slipped him into my hands, and hopped up to kiss me before disappearing. I leapt upward, chain Translocating until gravity fell away and pinpricks assaulted my eyes and ears. Much like Mega-Bear, the thing was tiny, but still fuckin' visible at this distance. I worked Vulcan's lever, cranking his string taut, then laying a single bolt against his cord. "Ready, Son?" I asked, snugging him against my cheek. Fucker just smugged at me in an anticipatory fashion. "No fucking around. I want that fucker dead, and no damage to the Worshipping Tentacle. Or any other ships. Capice?"

He smugged more. I fired, glaring at Big Bird as I rode out the inevitable side effects of firing Vulcan. For an instant, a bar of blue light connected Vulcan and the bird. Then two perpendicular lines shot out, one through its eyes, one from beak and cloaca. It froze, smoking, then rolled over and dove for the sea far below. I Translocated back to the Worshipping Tentacle, slinging Vulcan over my shoulder as I did.

"Brace for heavy seas!" I hollered, and the crew took up the cry, all of them securing themselves or getting under the deck. Hopefully they were securing themselves there as well, but at some point I've got to let folks be responsible for themselves. Trying to fight a sky chicken of unusual enormity, I'll intervene, riding out heavy seas on the other hand is something they're trained to do.

Before the wave reached us, the eight of me in the belly of the Black Dragon felt her guns speak. More than nine, some of them smaller than the others. Nine big near simultaneous rumbles, and half a dozen more slightly more asynchronous. Kitten?

The other is a humanoid Titan. A bit more than half the size of the one you engaged previously.

Why did we open fire?

It threw a rock.

I tensed up, ready to jump to the mast, but unwilling to jostle the Admiral's elbow. Tell me if they need me. Even just to knock some rocks away.

The Black Dragon's armor is strong. Stronger than the Titan's arm. Also? Its aim sucks. Keep the power flowing and let your crew fight.

My tension didn't go down as another salvo of five inch hurt sounded out a few seconds later. You sure?

The Navy needs this win, Champion. I will tell you if your intervention is needed.

Right around then, the first wave of the Avian Titan hit the Worshipping Tentacle, and it was all i could do to keep my hands gripping the mast. Because your girl is an idiot and decided that was the best place to ride that shit out. Of course, Marie had her arms around me and her claws at least an inch into the wood of the mast, so at least I wasn't alone in my idiocy.

I don't know whether it was hard trained Skills, or just old fashioned practice, but the Black Dragon's sixteen inch guns spoke thirty seconds after that first volley. In that time, another four shots sounded from the five inch guns, each volley a little more ragged than the last. I wanted desperately to leap to her defense, but I understood what Saffron meant. The Navy had trained for this, and the Black Dragon was the strongest ship in the fleet. If Saffron thought she stood a chance, I had to at least let them try.

I thought she thought they stood a chance, at any rate. Wait, can the five inch DPs even hurt that thing?

She chuckled. On the one hand, while the sixteen inch guns are, to scale, not large caliber, they have erased terrain features in your old world. The five inch guns are closer to very energetic pea shooters, and they barely range on it. On the other hand, they do have the range, and a very energetic pea shot very fast does unfortunate things when it hits half a head below the waist.

Yeah, I dunno who trained them, but I absolutely approved my gunners being trained that 'fighting fair' was for luchadors and boxers. Once guns came out, you fought to win.

The ship rolled, a lurching kind of thing that didn't match the slight shudder that rocked her when all nine sixteen inch guns fired at once. Are we hit?

No, love, but that rock got much closer. Hold fast. Thirty seconds went by, and the big guns did not fire. Just before I could ask why, the five inch guns fired, followed closely by the sixteen inch beasts. Shortly after that, Saffron sighed into my brain. It is done.

We got it?

Two sixteen inch high capacity shells into one of its eyes. It collapsed. We're remaining at battle stations for now, guns ready should it move again.

I thought for a second, recalling that old ROTC lecture about pain. Hit it with one turret, or maybe the five inch DPs. Won't play possum if you smack it in the ear like that.

Good thought. Another volley rang out, this one a single big gun and all of the smaller ones. No reaction.

Prolly dead then.

We'll still be remaining at battle stations until we can confirm it's dead.

I sighed. That's my job, isn't it?

I'm afraid so, love.

Then a very unpleasant thought hit me. Wait, if I'm not on the mast, how are you calling these sightings out? A moment later, i stood on the mast, looking at an absolutely unrepentant Imperator with spotting binocs dangling from her neck. "Why are you not at least in the battle bridge?"

She smirked up at me. "Because I thought we ought be somewhere no one is likely to hear us when my Goddess decides to make her displeasure with me known."

How the fuck was I supposed to respond to that?

Oh, yeah. I've got a flogger.

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