Raon had never once gone beyond mucosal guiding.And really, how could he have? The original Han Raon had never cared about anyone except Seo Dojin.Even though their match rate had been abysmal, Han Raon was the only S-rank Guide in the country. If not for Lee Hamin, he might’ve gotten exactly what he wanted—Seo Dojin all to himself.But the novel’s main bottom wasn’t him. It was Hamin.So in the end, Han Raon never formed a deep bond with anyone as a Guide.For someone that arrogant, to spend his whole career without so much as a kiss—what a joke.Raon had lived the same life once, but before that, in his original world, he’d dated like a normal person. Sure, it had been five years ago, and in another body entirely—but still.Well… it’ll be fine somehow.He decided to be optimistic and bent down. He’d always been good under pressure.After the flick to his forehead, Siwoo was completely dazed. Even as Raon’s face drew closer, he only blinked faintly, as if he couldn’t process what was happening.“Mm.”“Haa…”Raon let go of Siwoo’s wrist and cupped his face with both hands. Then, slowly, he leaned in and pressed his lips against his.This wasn’t about lust—it was treatment, nothing more. He told himself that firmly as he gave a short, deliberate kiss, then slipped his tongue out to wet Siwoo’s dry lips.It was a medical procedure. A medical procedure.…Except—Damn, why are his lips so soft?Five years or not, he couldn’t remember any of his past partners feeling like this. He licked at the now-damp lips again, and then, parting them slightly, slid his tongue between.“Mmph—”“Haa…”Siwoo’s hands were as cold as his power, but his mouth wasn’t. Heat surged inside him, burning hot. Raon frowned slightly as his tongue brushed the feverish warmth.No matter how good it felt, he couldn’t lose focus.Checking the wrist device between breaths, he saw the contamination level finally start to rise—stabilizing. Mucosal guiding was working.“Phew.”Crisis averted.He pulled back with a relieved sigh. His lips were shiny with shared moisture—he wasn’t even sure whose. It was embarrassing enough to make him wipe them quickly with the back of his hand.“Why…”“…?”Siwoo was staring up at him, lips still parted, eyes hazy and confused.His levels were better, but his mind clearly wasn’t clear yet.Raon felt a flicker of anxiety. Once Siwoo regained full consciousness, he’d probably explode. He spoke quickly, defensively.“I didn’t have a choice. Your levels were crashing, and holding your hand wasn’t enough—”“Why… stop?”“What?”Raon froze, finally realizing that that wasn’t the kind of “why” Siwoo meant.Before he could make sense of it, his vision flipped.“Ugh—!”He hit the floor hard. Only then did he realize Siwoo was on top of him. His mind wasn’t entirely there yet, but the recovery in his contamination levels meant his S-rank body was working again.“Hey—Yoon Siwoo—!”“……”Raon tried to twist free, but Siwoo caught his wrists and pinned them to the floor. Raon’s eyes went wide, meeting Siwoo’s fierce gaze.The black irises burned straight into him.***Siwoo could never forget the first time he saw Raon.He’d awakened as an esper at eight years old, and ten years later, he’d finally met his guide. The Center staff had practically thrown a parade—the match rate was unprecedented even for S-rank pairs. Everyone said the two of them were destined.But Siwoo had never longed for anything in his life.Abandoned at a shabby orphanage the moment he was born, treated like trash ever since, he’d learned early that no one was coming to save him.He had awakened not because of hope or talent, but because a Gate had opened near the orphanage, and adults had fled—leaving the children behind.He had understood the world far too young. Trust no one. Expect nothing. Survive.“This person will be guiding you from now on.”“……”But there had been one thing—just one thing—he had desperately wanted.A guide. Someone who could quiet the constant, splitting headaches that made him want to ❀ Nоvеlігht ❀ (Don’t copy, read here) tear his skull open.Espers without guiding went berserk. And when they burned out, they simply died.So when the staff member led him into that room, saying you’re lucky, we finally found your match, Siwoo thought—maybe, just maybe—Ah.He knew instantly. That man was his Guide.Hair as dark as ink, gleaming blue under the light like water catching the sky—he couldn’t look away. His heart thudded, out of rhythm.And then the man’s face twisted.“What the hell is this kid supposed to be?”“……!”Raon’s sharp tone sliced through the air. His eyes swept Siwoo from head to toe before he turned to the staffer with arms crossed.“Forget this. Bring me Seo Dojin. I’m pairing with him.”“Guide Han Raon, you can’t—”“Did I stutter?”Raon’s temper flared, and the staffer scrambled to placate him. Siwoo just stood there, silent.All he understood was that his one and only Guide had rejected him.After that, Raon became Alpha-1’s exclusive Guide—but he never once looked Siwoo’s way.Siwoo, used to disappointment, closed himself off completely.“Haa… ha… ngh—”Every time his body felt like it would tear apart, that face would come to mind—the one that used to sneer as he suffered.Even so, he had needed him. Needed that guiding. Wanted it so badly he could’ve begged on his knees.Each time that urge came, he clenched his teeth and endured.The pain splitting his skull, the burn in his veins—none of it compared to the real agony: knowing his own Guide didn’t want him.What’s the point of living like this?An esper unwanted by his guide—wouldn’t it be better to die before he lost control?He’d thought it a hundred times, a thousand. But he never did it. Because his Guide was still alive, still breathing somewhere nearby.He hated him, despised him, and yet—he couldn’t bring himself to curse him completely. It was a miserable existence.And then—Raon approached him out of nowhere, acting as if nothing had happened, smiling like it was the most natural thing in the world.Siwoo couldn’t believe it. The learned helplessness in his bones screamed louder than reason. He had trained himself not to hope, not to trust. Yet there Raon was again, disturbing his carefully built emptiness with that same beautiful, deceitful face.He wouldn’t fall for it. He wouldn’t believe it. In the end, Raon would change his mind again and mock him for being gullible.So he ignored the summons and swallowed the pills, as always, ready to ride out the pain alone.<……>Through the haze, he’d seen Raon calling his name.Half-conscious, Siwoo had dismissed it as another cruel hallucination—one he saw every time he was near breaking.He hated Raon. He loathed him. But his esper body still ached for his guide’s energy, craving it instinctively. Powerless, he’d let the current drag him under.“Why… stop?”“What?”Raon’s navy eyes widened.Watching that sudden panic, those blue eyes darken, Siwoo’s lips curved faintly upward.Yes. That was the Han Raon he knew.The one who hated him. The one who abandoned him.But in this hallucination, at least, Raon belonged entirely to him.“Mmph—!”Siwoo tilted his head and kissed him—roughly, without warning. Raon’s eyes flew open in shock.There was no need for mucosal guiding now. His contamination level wasn’t ideal yet, but it was stable enough.The real problem was that Siwoo—half delirious—was far too riled up.“Hyung… ah, feels good…”“Hey—wait—!”The dam burst. Siwoo’s kiss was wild, frantic, devouring him until Raon could barely breathe. His lips were seized and sucked harshly, leaving no space between them.This is insane.Kissing was no longer the issue. Every clash of mouths pressed their lower bodies together, friction sparking heat. If this kept up, Raon would lose control himself.He managed to shove Siwoo back, gasping.“Siwoo—hey—just—hold on, okay?”“……”They were still far too close—close enough for their noses to brush. Raon drew a shaky breath, trying to steady himself. Those black eyes didn’t blink, fixed on him with raw intensity.“Let’s… calm down a bit—”“…No.”“What?”“You’re my Guide…”“……”Siwoo’s voice was dreamy, drowsy, like he was sleep-talking. Raon couldn’t bring himself to push him away again.

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