"I swear," Nela groaned, floating belly-first across the air while chewing on a cosmic banana. "If your mortal life was a book, I'd read it in the bath, under the covers, and during staff meetings."

Pip chuckled, nervously sipping what could only be described as ambrosia milkshakes from a goblet that kept refilling itself. "It's weird. I never thought I'd be telling stories about… well, me... to goddesses."

Bela, golden and radiant, lay beside him with her chin in her hands. "You're too modest, darling. You and Vuvela are everyone's new obsession. Even the archivist angels are gossiping."

Hela swirled her drink lazily, draped across a cushion like a bored cat in lingerie. "Honestly… the way you talk about Vuvela. It's achingly sweet. You'd make a poet cry."

Pip gave a shy smile. "I just… I never thought I'd have something like that. Someone who believed in me. Even when I didn't."

Nela did a backflip mid-air and landed sprawled across his lap. "Ugh! You're killing me with the wholesomeness!"

"I miss her," Pip whispered. "I know she's worried. She must be freaking out. I want to go back… I need to go back. To her. To the team."

The three goddesses collectively awwww'd, their voices like a choir of horny doves.

"Pip," Bela said, brushing her fingers along his cheek, "you're a good soul. Despite everything you went through before this life—"

Hela chimed in, "The fear, the self-doubt, the… let's say, incredibly creative coping mechanisms."

Nela snorted. "Masturbating and doomscrolling in your underpants."

"—You made something beautiful of your second chance," Bela continued, shooting Nela a withering look. "The Great Mother doesn't do things by accident. She gave you to Vuvi, and Vuvi to you, because you were meant to build something together. Something the world needed."

"And now," Hela purred, rising in a swirl of light, "you need to go back to her."

The goddesses stood in unison, divine energy crackling around them like a sensual lightning storm. Pillars of light spun upward, forming a glowing mandala.

Nela clapped her hands. "Alright, mister sexy snack, prepare to be shot back into your sex-machine!"

The magic surged.

The chanting rose.

Light exploded.

…

Nothing.

Pip blinked.

"Uh," Hela said, cocking her head. "Did we… miss?"

"I aimed properly!" Nela shouted. "Maybe his soul's being clingy."

Bela frowned. "No, the soul tether's fine. His body should be calling him back... unless…"

"Unless it's not ready yet," Nela finished.

The three began arguing immediately.

"Did you calibrate the oscillation field?"

"Did you bless the exit point properly?"

"I thought you were doing it!"

"I was busy singing the harmony!"

Pip cleared his throat. "Uh... sorry to interrupt, but… what happens now?"

They all turned and shrugged.

Bela sighed dramatically. "We'll have to ask Mother."

Nela fell face-first onto a pillow. "She's gonna ground us. I'm talking celibacy spells and cloud cleaning duties for decades!"

Hela sniffled. "She made me clean the soul pits last time. Ugh."

Pip's eyes widened. "You're going to tell the Great Mother?"

"We'll be back," Bela said with a soft pat to his shoulder. "Just make yourself at home."

Then they vanished into the clouds, glittering streaks of divine panic.

-------------

Pip sat in stunned silence, surrounded by floating fruit, soft beds, and ambient harp music. Slowly, he looked down at his hands. His old hands.

He flexed them.

"I wasted it," he whispered. "My first life."

His fingers trembled. "I blamed everything… my lack of job, my parents, the world. But it was me. I let it rot. I let me rot."

He lay back on the bed, staring up at the glowing sky.

"But then Vuvi found me. And Penelo, and Sera, and Lula, and Veena… even Zora, in his own dramatic-ass way. They made me feel like I mattered."

A tear slipped down his cheek.

"I had friends. Lovers. A family."

He laughed softly, voice cracking with joy. "Thank you, Great Mother. For giving me that life. Even if it's over now."

Then he looked down between his thighs.

"Hey, buddy," he whispered. "Good to have you back! I missed you. I was worried you got vaporized. You good down there?"

His voice dropped conspiratorially. "Listen, if we ever get out of here, we're never doing that divine overload thing again, yeah?"

Then, suddenly, with a poof of flower-scented mist. The three goddesses, Bela, Nela, and Hela, tumbled into the room in a nervous flurry of wings, glowing veils, and hushed bickering.

"I told you we should've waited till he got to the High Temple," Bela snapped, frowning.

"Don't give me that! You're the one that conjured the summoning thread." Hela whispered, gliding dramatically toward the bed.

Nela bounced in upside down, hair falling upward. "So we all agree this was a terrible idea, right?"

Pip blinked. "...W-What?"

"Nothing!" all three sang in unison.

They huddled together, backs turned to him.

"Okay, what if we say it was an accident?" Hela whispered.

"A divine yoink of fate? You think Mother would believe that?" Nela offered.

"Or a trial," Bela added, "a sacred spiritual examination—"

But then the air changed.

Pip felt it first. A warm, dense pressure brushing against his skin like invisible silk sheets. Then it pressed harder, making his spine straighten. Then harder still, like standing beneath an avalanche made of honey.

His breath caught. He gasped, clutching his chest.

"What's… what's happening?" he croaked.

The goddesses turned in sync, all three of them now pale. The color drained from Bela's golden glow. Hela's pearls cracked. Nela stopped bouncing.

"Get behind us," Bela ordered.

They surrounded Pip in an instant, forming a shimmering triangle of divine light. Sacred glyphs spun in the air. Heavenly wards activated. The heavens themselves began trembling.

Then… from the clouds at Pip's feet… a figure began to form.

First a toe, sculpted from rose-gold mist. Then calves, thighs, hips, and a towering torso of swaying cloud, shaped like a woman too perfect to describe. Her face remained blurred, indistinct, as if it refused mortal comprehension.

Her voice dropped like velvet thunder.

"Welcome to my home, little soul."

Pip's eyes rolled back in his head and his body collapsed like a puppet with its strings cut. His mind instantly overwhelmed by The Great Mother's spiritual presence.

The room went silent.

The three sisters gasp.

"Oh… oops." muttered The Great Mother.

She looked at Pip's unconscious form.

"Oh dear," she murmured. "I always forget how fragile they are."

She turned her gaze on her daughters. They straightened like scolded schoolgirls.

"You three," the Great Mother boomed, "this is exactly why I didn't want him brought here yet. His spiritual pressure is still way too weak."

Bela cleared her throat. "We were just curious! He's… interesting."

"You mean hot," Nela mumbled.

The Great Mother ignored that.

"That boy's soul is growing, yes, but it's still bound to a vessel. Vuvela Blackthorn is the only mortal who understands the kind of construct that can contain what he's becoming. That's why I left him with her."

Hela squinted. "Wait… becoming what, exactly?"

Bela and Nela turned to her.

"…Yeah," Nela said slowly. "Why him, Mother? Is this about the spiritual imbalance in the world? Are you… grooming him to fix it?"

The Great Mother chuckled. A rich, swirling sound that made the walls of heaven thrum.

"Oh stars, no. I don't care about that mess. The world did that to itself. It's long overdue for a cleansing anyway."

A beat of silence.

"Wait," Bela whispered. "Cleansing?"

"Yup," the Great Mother said cheerfully. "Once he's ready, I plan to wipe the slate clean. A fresh start."

The room froze.

"With him at my side," she added, almost giddy.

The three sisters gasped again. Nela literally screamed into a cloud pillow.

"Wait wait wait… hold up!" Bela cried. "You're telling us… you brought him all the way here, across dimensions, and put his soul in a divinely-powered sex-golem… just to make him your boyfriend?!"

The Mother folded her arms proudly. "Exactly!"

Hela's eye twitched. "You created an entire divine love pipeline… to make him strong enough… for you?"

"I did." She smirked. "My last consort was useless. You remember your father… weak, lazy, never satisfied me. I banished him to the mortal plane."

Nela blinked. "You exiled Dad for being bad in bed?!"

"I'm a goddess of creation," she said, shrugging. "I deserve better."

She turned to Pip's unconscious body, voice softening. "So I searched the aether for the perfect soul. The most beautiful, the most broken, the most lust-starved little spark I could find… and I plopped it right into the Blackthorn girl's fancy toy."

Hela's jaw hung open.

Bela blinked. "And the whole 'he's a chosen one' thing?"

"Call it a happy side effect," the Mother waved. "Let him bang his way across the continent. It's good for his growth. Once he hits critical spirit mass, I'll ascend him to godhood."

She smiled.

"And then we'll start over. Together."

The room was dead silent.

Then…

Pip groaned, fingers twitching.

The Great Mother's eyes went wide. "Oh, stars… he's waking up."

She pointed at the girls. "No one says a word!"

The three goddesses saluted instantly. "Not a word, Mother."

Pip blinked, groggy, rubbing his face.

"…Ugh. What hit me? Did someone drop a cloud on my head?"

Bela quickly knelt beside him, brushing his hair back.

"You fainted, darling," she said sweetly.

"From how gorgeous we are," Hela added quickly.

Nela gave a thumbs up. "Definitely not because Mom's trying to snuggle you into godhood and end the world."

Bela elbowed her.

Pip blinked again, looking around at the nervous faces. "O-Okay—"

He paused, looking down.

"…Wait. Why is my dick glowing?"

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