The smell of BBQ was really getting Amelia salivating, but she couldn't just head on in without dealing with the guest in the background. God damn, I should start my own fan club. I'd be rolling in coin, no cap.

She walked Horace through the front yard and into the garden.

Horace's sister was tinkering with some sort of mechanical contraption. Clicks and clacks rang out in the air as she fiddled around, because this house ain't raising no jive ass turkeys. "Breh, you're getting stuck into hard labour from the time ya can walk. Here's a scroodriva; get stuck in. Be like your sis, aite." The words of Horace's grandpa whirled through his mind as he watched her use a blowtorch at the age of eight without any safety gear.

"Mum she's not wearing anything." Horacio, my meat is calling, "She knows the risks luv. C'mon, get in the garden and tell your father what today was like." Condescending tones were not something Horace understood yet, but he wandered over to his dad, grilling up a set of ribs that were longer than his mum was taller.

Amelia shut the garden door gently, then proceeded to stroll back through the house. "Alayem, what colour eyebrows do you want today?"

"Green mum." Amelia pulled out a paintbrush and some suspiciously vibrant green liquid that was hanging out of a toolbox. She dipped the brush in and quickly painted what could barely pass as eyebrows onto Alayem. In a rush, specks of paint flicked onto the sides, giving her a terribly placed set of highlights on the left side of her head. "They won't grow back if you keep burning them off, Alayem."

This book's true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.

"I'll have invented a hair regrowth formula by the time I'm twelve, Mum."

"Sure you will luv." (Spoilers: she really did).

***

Lurking in a bush outside the stacked trailer house. Emcee was still somehow not understanding how fucking creepy it was to have spent the past three hours following and then proceeding to peer through her target's windows.

I hope I get a chance today; the guild are probably gonna kill me for taking so long to get back.

She saw Amelia climb a ladder to the trailer above the first-floor trailer, and Emcee tried to rush over to a tree that was nearby.

To say her bodily waste left her at breakneck speed would be an understatement. As she climbed up the tree and sat in a position on a branch looking directly inside the trailer. A face dangled upside down from a branch above her. She tried to scream at the top of her lungs, but Amelia silenced her, shoving her hand over her mouth.

"Shush now. You've been a busy bee, little Miss Wotters. What gave you the idea that it was ok to follow me and my special little sausage to the family home, THAT I INTENTIONALLY KEEP SECRET FROM WANKERS LIKE YOU!" Emcee noticed the green wind had surrounded the tree. A muter sphere had been used, the first time she had it used on her; the shouting from Amelia was being ignored by the locals.

"I-I-I'm sorry Mrs Jones! I just saw how cool you were back there, and---and I wanted to be like you. I want to be your apprentice!"

Apprentice huh. Amelia quickchanged into her downtime gear. Barefoot, blue tight shorts with some weird fabric from another world, a schmocken fibre white t-shirt, and finished by putting her hair in curlers.

"Alright. If you want to be like me, get started. Old Joe has a room free. One rule: you never show your face in front of me kids, or I'll blow ya fecking head off. Comprende?"

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