The goddess, Serilia, was surprised by my words. It seems this is the first time one of their creations has refused a gift from the gods.

"Sweetie, you must. There won't be a soul on Maliterr without a serious advantage over you, and I'm the divine entity; I made you, so just accept the changes, or I'll be mad!"

"No." I retorted like a petulant teenager. "I'm not getting myself mixed up in this nonsense. Next time we meet, it will be because I've lived a normal life and died of NATURAL causes."

As if the startled, turned-sour appearance was not enough, her face contorted into a spectacularly terrifying and twisted grin, and the prospect of going into round two was on the horizon. I AM STANDING MY GROUND HERE, I screamed internally.

"Look, your almightiness, I was never special before, and I'd like to keep it that way, the milestone life, you know? Reaching the age of thirty with my hair still intact or retiring at the age of sixty-five with my back fully functioning, I'll stay out of trouble, and if it finds me, well then, we'll have a good laugh over it."

Serilia looked at me with a surprisingly neutral look on her face, though it was less smiley than before.

"Fine, Terrahuum… I will send you back," transporting us to a large room full of grand and expensive-looking white and gold marbled pillars, and in the centre of the room lay a glowing turquoise circle upon a stone platform.

"Once you step through, you'll arrive on Maliterr; the old worlds Terra and Malicore are one now. Several lands have been replaced or relocated, so it will take a little time getting used to it all," she said in a dry tone.

I nodded to her, which ended up appearing more like a bow, and she returned the action reluctantly, it seemed. Touching the circle, I at once blacked out. And when I awoke, I found myself on Maliterr, the newly formed world, in the year two thousand forty.

There are four regions. To the cold mountainous north. Live most of the Dornam or SUDS of a beaches, as I prefer to call them. Like elves from my childhood fantasy media: Fat, bearded, short and Artless or Lùthless, as I should say. Almost forgot about the sharp, talon-like hands too. They're a technologically advanced bunch with frat boy and sorority girl personalities.

To the flattened, farm-like west are the more Lùth and craft-focused Hankae. They look a little like Terrahuums, though taller and slenderer, and they have odd, pointy ears. Oh, yeah! They are born with odd birthmarks on their left hand that supposedly signify a particular specialty in an element, though I doubt that it's true.

They are a little bit like that famous teenager, Lari Bopper and the Sorcerers' side room of the hallowed prisoner goblet pt - I, II, III.

To the east live the Three-Tribe Koan, living in a fairytale creature land with the dazzling animal-like populations and the multi-coloured forests dotted around the place.

Koanor are broad and bird-like with feathers giving natural gliding benefits; they tend to be more involved in the service industry, as butlers and chefs, that sort of thing.

Did you know this text is from a different site? Read the official version to support the creator.

Koanit are short and dumpy, looking like giant brown chinchillas that are notoriously durable little blighters and tend to be in the craft and exploration trade. What the hell is a chinchilla anyway?

Koanei are split into two subgroups. The Felidhan tend to focus on frontline fighting; they're bigger, more muscular, and more suited to those ways of living, whilst the Huundhan are more averse to the long-distance archer types, being slenderer and hypersensitive to sight, smell, and sounds.

I think the coolest thing about the Koan lands is the Colossi not far from the main city. Over one hundred feet in height and probably as wide, I think. I was never the best with mathematics.

Super convenient, those Colossi don't eat us. Synthphotosis, I'm told it's called, is the primary way they obtain energy. They get nutrients from the BOF. That's 'Big Orange Friend' according to the Impies or 'Sun' according to the rest of us. Also, a blessing they happen to be vegetarians.

Oh yeah, in the south are the Tusen Atolls. Home to scaly Scaq's and boring Huums and us Terrahuums. No difference between us, but we get neat little H and TH tattoos to show off. And the Scaq…well, they come in various shades: Green, dark green, light green…in-between greens… I saw a red and blue together once.

"Thanks for the history lesson, but can you just get this over with already? I'd rather meet the maker again than listen to the SHART coming out of your yapper anymore." The brave little Hankae bandit barked at me.

I look the poor bugger in the eye; a kick to the thigh goes his way to remind him he's in no position to talk, and he yelps in pain.

"Oof, ya bugger!"

I bet you are struggling to understand what's happening so far. Don't worry; you wouldn't be the first, and now you know how I felt when it all happened.

My closest friend Wardi was tall, broad-shouldered, and dark-haired; the ladies loved him back home in the old world, but romance wasn't his thing.

He received the gift of the Scale from the goddess Librata. Enabling him to figure out the morality of one's actions, words, crimes, you name it, gives a blessing or curse to the target based on the outcome.

I forgot to give the fine print; my bad. These godly gifts... well, through trial and error, we realised that they are not usually beneficial, though that is because the activation requirements on at least half are random. Wardi's requirement: a large blood donation to power its activation.

He overcomes this by keeping a flask of "Bosh," as he likes to call it. He makes a small donation to it occasionally for when he does need to use it without causing himself any negative effects. Never a pretty sight, catching him midway refilling.

Rhua was another friend from the old world. She was in the marketing department at work, so we did not cross paths that often. Always took the time to sit with me and Wardi during lunch breaks, even more so after we found out she was a game nut.

Scanger – God of social relations, gifted her the Caller. It's been seven years, and STILL, she doesn't know how to even use it. The only information it provides is

Requires a collective to use. In addition, under the 'Cosmic Union Law Act of 42069 BC, Caller will not function on weekdays or the holidays. I'm telling you; the divine entities should be made to take IQ tests before they are given positions of power. Who makes stuff like that a thing?

The first of our friends we made from Malicore was Horace Van Sjokkolade Edelweiss Jones. If blokes were a drink, he would probably be the most top bloke in the world.

If you can think it, he can sniff it out: plants, food, metals, minerals, and gems. Yes, I do mean sniff it out, and no, Horace is not a Huundhan. Ok, well, he is half, but that's not the point. The god Fenreer gifted him the power of the seeker.

He's got the only consistently useful gift among my group, but it has on occasion gotten us into encounters.

Like that one time we were hired to partake in a foraging request on the Barrow Plains of Gilia, and then these bandits just showed up demanding, "Everything we got unless you wanna taste cold steel."

I took that personally and punched the beard off the shortest dude there… Oh wait, that's now!

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