Basic Thaumaturgy for the Emotional Incompetent [A Magical Academy LitRPG]

Book 2 Chapter 9.14: Critical Kettle Damage


Severa stared at him as if someone had abruptly rewritten the script of reality in front of her. She hadn't even managed to form a single syllable before flames wreathed up his arms in a roaring spiral.

"Tommaso Ardefiamme, at your service! Border Army, Third Pyroline, Frontier Cleaving Division! Also, Instructant Lugano is on the way!" Tommaso shouted. The title alone sounded like it could punch holes in mountains. A whip-thin jet of fire arced out from his gauntlet, spiraling down into a cluster of Chasm Mantes attempting to flank them from below. The fire detonated in a tight burst that left a ring of scorched air.

Tommaso swooped toward them. "Fabrisse, dude. Drop the rocks into my gauntlet!"

Fabrisse blinked. "Your gauntlet?"

Tommaso thrust one gauntlet forward, turning it palm-up. Along the sides were small compartments lined with runes, glowing orange. "Look at these sweet side compartments!" he shouted, grinning. "Fire-resistant and shockproof! The future is today, my man. I usually use them for ember capsules, but rocks work just fine." He blasted away another cluster of mantes as he spoke. "Come on, lad! Load me up!"

Fabrisse winced. "I can't reach my pocket . . . the insect inside will bite me . . ."

Severa shot Fabrisse a sharp glance. "You can summon the subject. Just think about it."

"Are you sure?" Fabrisse shouted, ducking under another jet of fire from Tommaso.

"Of course." She fired a column of violet-and-gold aether that incinerated a diving Chasm Mantis. "Mental commands are how archmagi design their Aetherrealms."

"I'm not an archmagus."

Tommaso conjured a sweeping cone of flame from his other gauntlet to incinerate a pair of swooping mantises. "Damn—you open your own Aetherrealm now?"

Before Fabrisse could answer, Severa's voice cut across the roar of fire and shrieking mantises. "Ardefiamme! Attend the flanks immediately! Intercept those descending from below! Do not let anything reach the ground—and remember, don't channel any emotion into your spells. It might destabilize the rift even more."

Tommaso grinned, spinning as jets of fire streaked out. "On it! Keep your columns coming!"

Severa fired again, this time splitting her attention between the top and lower rift edges, her sigils whipping through the air like living threads of light. "Kestovar! Just summon—actually, just do nothing!"

The moment Severa said 'just do nothing,' Fabrisse felt his resolve crumble. Nothing? Now I don't want to do 'nothing' anymore.

He pictured the insect tearing into his fingers, mandibles gnashing, the sting of a puncture and the slick scrape of chitin against skin, and instinctively flinched. Yet, just as Severa had instructed, he focused on the rock he wanted and tried his best to not imagine insects anymore.

Severa was right. He got the rock.

He glanced at Tommaso, whose flaming gauntlets whipped through the air in precise arcs, carving a deadly rhythm through the unending swarm. Each Chasm Mantis he incinerated seemed to be replaced by two more, then three, then four. The swarm was unending, and Fabrisse knew better than to interrupt him now.

Check the inventory, he thought.

[Inventory slot: 11/11]

Throwmitts of Misguised Bravado x2

Kettle x2

Trinav Quartz x3

Lightfold Refuge Script x1

Concord of the Fifth Line x1

Rock Satchel x1

 

[Satchel slot: 15/15]

Normal Stupenstone x6

STR Stupenstone x3

Glowing Stupenstone x1

Gravelkin x1

New Rare Rocks from the cave x4

Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.

 

[Aetherrealm slot: 7/10]

Epic Rocks x1

Silvial Quartz x4

Chasm Mantis x2

Why did I have to bring all the rocks with me today . . . He forgot to remove the stupid kettle from his earlier experiment, too. It still sat inside his biggest robe pocket.

Already full. But that was only the limit imposed by the Eidralith. He could store more in other pockets if he wanted—it would be awkward, cumbersome, and he wouldn't receive the usual buffs—but he didn't need them right now.

Fabrisse's eyes turned to the kettle nestled in his robe pocket. Might as well . . .

The moment he pulled it out, a Chasm Mantis swooped past Severa's wall of fire and lunged at them.

It's too close!

Instinct took over. He swung the kettle. A sickening clatter resounded as the kettle slipped from his hands, smashed the insect across its face, and the creature alongside the kettle dropped into the ground far below.

[Damage Dealt: Critical Kettle Damage]

[Random Event Trigger—Hitting an Insect with a Kettle: +1 STR]

[Inventory slot: 9/11]

"Kestovar! What did you just swing with?" Came Severa's voice.

Fabrisse didn't answer. Instead, he focused on his next task: transferring all his rocks into the other pockets, bypassing the usual Eidralith-imposed limit. The process was awkward and mentally taxing, requiring precise visualization to ensure each stone landed exactly where he wanted, but finally he was done.

[Aetherrealm slot: 2/10]

Chasm Mantis x2

Another Chasm Mantis dove at them from above. Fabrisse's eyes snapped open. "Montreal! Swing your hip left!"

Severa's gaze shot to him, but instinctively she twisted her stance.

Fabrisse flung his robe with all his strength, angling it just right. The mantis collided with the fabric and was sucked cleanly into the Aetherrealm.

[Captured: Chasm Mantis]

[Aetherrealm slot: 4/10]

Chasm Mantis count: 1/4

The next Chasm Mantis plunged toward them. He pictured the exact pocket in his Aetherrealm, traced the trajectory in his mind, and flung his robe once more. The mantis struck it dead-center, instantly absorbed.

[Captured: Chasm Mantis]

[Aetherrealm slot: 6/10]

Chasm Mantis count: 2/4

Then he heard Severa's voice over her burning flames, "You're actually quite dexterous, Kestovar."

"Thanks."

Another mantis swooped from the side. Fabrisse adjusted for the angle, anticipating its spin mid-air.

[Captured: Chasm Mantis]

[Aetherrealm slot: 8/10]

Chasm Mantis count: 3/4

The fourth and final target came barreling from above, faster than the others. Fabrisse's hands moved almost automatically. He thought of the mantis, visualized the exact weight, the exact fold in his robe, and threw it at the perfect vector.

[Captured: Chasm Mantis]

[Aetherrealm slot: 10/10]

Chasm Mantis count: 4/4

[QUEST COMPLETED: Contain the Chasm]

Reward: +100 EXP

New Concordance Skill: Subspace Compression (Rank I)

Effect: Objects stored in the Aetherrealm now occupy 50% less space

Fabrisse barely had a moment to savor his success before he noticed something odd. They had been so focused on the swarm, on keeping the Chasm Mantes from reaching the ground, that no one had noticed the rift had been creeping toward them. The rift was now only over ten paces away, and the Chasm Mantes wavered against the entrance of the rift like shadows rippling beneath a disturbed surface. Some of them even flew backward, back into the rift.

"They're retreating?" Tommaso's voice rang out.

"No," Fabrisse murmured. He traced the distorting outline of the rainbow rift. They looked more and more like rippling waves. "They're being sucked in." Then, in a meeker voice, he asked, "Montreal. Have you ever seen a sentient dungeon before?"

"No. That shouldn't be possible—"

Before anyone could react further, a sharp tearing sound like stitching snapping echoed. Tommaso flung a jet of flame at the rift, but it fizzled against the edge. Severa thrust a sigil forward, but it splintered like a broken mirror.

Severa cursed, "Ah, by Synod's balls—"

The dungeon mouth roared, then with the sound of a roaring hurricane, sucked them all in.

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