"Doctor Jeffrey Harrigan was attempting to reach the Feast of Fools."

"Guys, are we in a spot where we can do this? It'll be bad. If you don't want to listen in, it's cool."

But a lot of people, Humans included, wanted to hear. Okay.

"Good morning, Doctor."

"It's midnight here, but thank you."

"Our friend is in your hands, isn't she? Let us talk to her."

"It's not in a position to speak with anyone."

"Unless we speak to her, I'll have to assume she died. We'll move forward based on that, and the reasons you took her won't matter."

"When you're right you're right. Hold on."

The Radio wasn't narrating. Apparently that feature didn't work in Nevada, USA, Earth. Tighter security, perhaps. The microphone clicked.

Harrigan's voice, faint. "Come on, be a good girl. Say something to your friends."

I heard Schmendrick. High-pitched hissing breaths through her nose.

"Let it hear you," Harrigan suggested.

"Sweetie," I said.

I was drowned out. Everyone on the call might have begun shouting. "Schmendrick!" "Are you okay?" "I love you, Schmendrick." A babble, a crowd of worry, dozens of Human voices.

Cassie: "The babies are okay!"

And Taylor; it had to be him. Sobbing. Trying to speak and failing.

We heard a rattling sound. If I had to guess, it was a wire cage. And her voice. "Husband. Babies." She spoke slowly. "Cassie."

Husband Schmendrick was on the line. He was trying to talk to her in Huntspeak. The subsonics vibrated in my bones. We all fell silent so she could hear him.

The cage rattled, a desperate, tinny sound. Schmendrick began screaming, barking, yapping. No words, not in Day Cazador, Huntspeak, English or Espanol. Just screaming. The cage rattled. Screaming.

Screaming.

It faded; Harrigan was walking away from her. "There are good people and bad ones," he began.

Oh, was it lecture time today? "Humans," I said. "Bad Humans."

"There are good Humans and bad ones. You know how you can tell the difference? Both kinds of Humans are equally stupid, equally silly and wrong. But the bad ones want to punish. It's their go-to move. Punish the ones hurting you. Punish poor people for not working hard enough. Put them in prisons, let them starve. Punishment is everything."

I was breathing evenly. I wasn't going to get upset. I wasn't going to act upset, anyway. And everyone else listening to the call had gone silent.

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Cold.

"The good Humans," Harrigan said. "The good ones? All they want to do is rescue. Those bad people over there, they wouldn't be bad if they weren't hungry. They wouldn't hurt anyone if they hadn't been hurt themselves. Both kinds of Human are wrong, of course. Things aren't so simple."

"Tell us what you want, Doctor."

"We want you to–"

"We? Who is we, Doctor, who gives you orders?"

"You don't interrupt me, Owen. We want you to build for us. We know you're good at it. Build a city for us to live in. For Humanity to start over."

"A city. For how many?"

"Five citizens. Five thousands workers and the quarters they'll need. The citizens need VIP accommodation, of course. They'll need up-to-date networking capacity. They'll bring their own machines but the place they live needs to have infrastructure that works with it."

"You want a city for five."

"Five thousand and five, technically. But only five citizens. The rest are … helpers that we allow to live with them. We also need walls, the city requires walls."

"Nothing here will be kept out by walls, Doctor. You know this. None of the scary things here even notice walls."

"Silly. The walls aren't to keep things out, Owen. The helpers might feel like they should leave. They didn't work hard enough. They should feel grateful to be taken along with the citizens."

"They deserve walls?"

"That's the mindset, yeah? Telling them to feel grateful for it. These guys…" He sounded annoyed.

"What makes you think we won't punish you for this, Doctor?"

"You let me talk to him. It was…I was able to talk to my son."

"So you think you're off the hook. Because we rescue. Not punish."

"I don't think you want to kill anyone, even for this."

"No," I said. My voice sounded strange. My ears were roaring with my pulse. "No. You'll be alive, Doctor. You and your five citizens. You won't be killed, I swear that."

"Of course," he said. "We have her, after all."

"You're going to live," I said. "All of you. Forever. You'll never be able to stop living. Ever. No matter how much you wish it otherwise, Doctor."

I heard him swallow. "My city?"

"You could have asked us. We would have helped the Earth. But instead, this. Why?"

He swallowed again. "They want to make sure it's done right."

"And they only want certain people to come over here. Only the deserving people."

"Yes. They told me you'd get distracted by trying to save people who didn't deserve saving. Lazy people. Bad people."

"Billions of them, left on the Earth to starve or roast in the heat or shrivel up in the droughts."

"Now you're getting it."

"When will they send her back, Doctor?"

"When they see you're acting in good faith. They want to see the beginnings of their city. Then she gets to go home."

"Okay. Radio, Harrigan is no longer speaking with us."

"Wait," Harrigan said, and he sounded miffed. "I want to–"

"Jeffrey Harrigan and his five listeners had been removed from the conversation," said the Green Radio. It did not sound happy.

"I need volunteers to build a fake city," I told the Feast of Fools. "And I need volunteers to invade the Earth and get her back."

I had volunteers. One option was considerably more popular than the other.

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