Chapter 55: Fourth Review Product! (2)
Chapter 55 – Fourth Review Product! (2)
[Transdimensional Marketing: “Mr. Chen, congratulations. Your true subscriber count has broken through the 40,000 mark.”]
Sunday, morning:
Chen Yu woke up to the vibration of his phone beneath his pillow. After he tapped on his phone screen in a daze, the first thing that entered his sight was this message. Energy immediately filled him, and he became fully awake.
[Chen Yu: “When did it happen?”]
[Transdimensional Marketing: “Just now. Congratulations.”]
“Nice!”
Chen Yu hurriedly got out of bed, then sat at his study table and opened his laptop to visit Bilibili’s platform.
…
[Transdimensional Review! Golden Finger from the future!]
Views: 1,499,273
Bullet comments: 21,988
Comments: 34,859
Likes: 114,442
Shares: 98,400
Donated Coins: 72,872
Bilibili subscribers: 855,240
…
In just one week, he had gained 1.5 million views!
Moreover, this was only his third review video!
Nobody on Bilibili could compete with his growth speed.
What a pity. If I weren’t being actively censored on the internet, my popularity would be even greater.
With a regretful grunt, Chen Yu exited Bilibili and entered his Profile page on the Transdimensional Marketing Terminal. Compared to Bilibili’s statistics, he was more concerned about the statistics here.
…
[Name: Chen Yu]
[Grade: E (Prohibited from Worldwide Livestreaming)]
[Subscribers: 40,132]
[Main Target: Complete at least two of four missions. Target achieved. (2/2)]
[Additional Target 1: Complete at least three of four missions. Target achieved. (3/3)]
[Additional Target 2: Complete four of four missions. (3/4)]
[Mission 1: Reach (808,924/500) viewers and (40,132/50) subscribers on the first advertisement. Mission complete.]
[Mission 2: Reach (808,924/5,000) viewers and (40,132/500) subscribers on the second advertisement. Mission complete.]
[Mission 3: Reach (808,924/50,000) viewers and (40,132/5,000) subscribers on the third advertisement. Mission complete.]
[Mission 4: Reach (808,924/500,000) viewers and (40,132/50,000) subscribers on the fourth advertisement. Mission incomplete.]
…
I just need around 9,000 subscribers. It’s a done deal. My girl is secured.
After excitedly rubbing his palms together, Chen Yu pulled out his phone and typed a message.
[Chen Yu: “Will the express delivery arrive later? Can you send it to me ahead of time so that I can start making the video sooner?”]
[Transdimensional Marketing: “I’m sorry, Mr. Chen. The product can only arrive at 9 A.M. sharp.”]
[Chen Yu: “Alright, then. Can you tell me what the product is? I know the rules. I just wish to know if this product can help with hiding my identity.”]
[Transdimensional Marketing: “It will! It will be of great help! Mr. Chen, please rest assured!”]
Upon seeing these words, Chen Yu excitedly clenched his fist. He then sent a 200 yuan red packet[1] through WeChat without hesitation.
[Transdimensional Marketing: “Thank you for your goodwill, Mr. Chen. However, we are unable to collect this money.”]
[Chen Yu: “I know you can’t collect it. That’s why I sent it. (Unsent)”]
[Chen Yu: “What a pity.”]
[Transdimensional Marketing: “:)”]
Exiting WeChat, Chen Yu took a look at the time.
It was currently half past seven in the morning.
There was still an hour and a half before the express delivery arrived.
“This is agony!”
Taking a deep breath, Chen Yu walked to the door and carefully opened it.
Thud!
As soon as Chen Yu opened the door, something fell in front of him.
When he lowered his head for a closer look, he discovered that it was a bag of tattered clothes.
Obviously, this was Chen Yike’s prank on him.
“It’s been two days already. That little girl is still angry at me?”
While saying so, Chen Yu kicked the bag of clothes. However, as soon as he did so, a sharp pain came from his foot.
“Ouch!”
Chen Yu cried out in pain and hurriedly squatted down to hug his foot.
“It hurts…”
Huff! Huff!
Blowing at his foot a few times, Chen Yu discovered that two small drops of blood had seeped out of his toe.
In a fit of anger, Chen Yu reached out and tore the bundle of clothing apart, only to see a cactus ball roll out of the bundle!
It turned out that the falling bundle of clothing wasn’t meant to hit him at all. Instead, it was meant to hide the “hidden weapon” inside it, as well as fake him into dropping his guard.
“*&@#*+***…”
Chen Yu’s face flushed with anger. This prank made him feel as if he was being overwhelmed in terms of intelligence.
“Chen Yike!”
Clenching his fists, Chen Yu angrily stalked into the living room and pushed open the door to Chen Yike’s room. Just as he was about to start berating Chen Yike, however…
Splash!
A tub of water came falling toward him, drenching him.
Chen Yu: “…”
Hearing the noise, Chen Yike drowsily rubbed her eyes. When she saw Chen Yu’s drenched figure, she yawned and said, “Morning.”
Removing the tub and wiping the remnant water on his face, Chen Yu gnashed his teeth as he shouted, “Chen Yike! You’re going too far!”
“Who told you to barge into my room?” Sitting up on her bed, Chen Yike stretched her body as she said, “I washed my feet last night and was too lazy to get rid of it immediately, so I placed it above the door. Is there a problem with that?”
“What?! A foot wash!?”
Chen Yu’s anger flared even further at this discovery. He immediately tried to pounce on Chen Yike. However, as soon as he moved forward, he tripped over a few strips of transparent Scotch tape and fell to the floor.
Thud!
The floorboards trembled slightly at Chen Yu’s fall.
Chen Yu: “…”
Seeing this, Chen Yike tossed aside her blanket and lazily got off her bed. She then left her room, stepping on Chen Yu’s bum on her way out.
“What fine weather today. I’m happy.”
Chen Yu: “…”
…
Half an hour later, the Chen family crowded around the dining table and started having breakfast.
“Chen Yu, how much did you earn these past few days?” Mother Chen asked.
At these words, Father Chen, who sat beside Mother Chen, instantly perked up his ears.
“I earned 7,000.”
“That much?!” Mother Chen’s eyes glowed at Chen Yu’s answer. Stretching out her hand, she said, “Give it to your mother. I’ll keep it safe for you.”
“No.” Frowning, Father Chen said, “Give it to your father. I’ll keep it for you.”
“Uh…” Chen Yu immediately grew hesitant in this situation.
“Give it to your mother!”
“Give it to your father!”
“Have you forgotten how much your mother loves you? You must give it to me!”
“Does that mean your father doesn’t love you? I give you meat every day! Give it to me!”
“Your father has a bad heart! He used to rub your cheeks every day when you were young to warm his hands!”
“Does that mean your mother has a good heart? Instead of buying you milk, she simply fed you crushed vegetables when you were young!”
“Old Chen! Stop spouting nonsense! He should’ve started eating rice already back then!”
“You have the gall to say that?! It’s because you didn’t provide our son with enough nutrients when he was young that his intelligence did not develop properly!”
Chen Yu: “?”
Rolling up her sleeves, Mother Chen said, “If milk has nutrients, does that mean rice and vegetables don’t have nutrients?”
Smacking the table, Father Chen said, “Are they even the same thing? A cat is a cat! Does that mean a panda is a cat, as well?[2]”
“You’re taking things out of context! They don’t make sense!”
“You’re the one that doesn’t make sense! A seahorse isn’t a horse! A pineapple isn’t a pear![3]” After saying so, Father Chen pointed at Chen Yu agitatedly and continued, “A single dog[4] isn’t a dog, either!”
Chen Yu: “???”
Standing up from his seat, Chen Yu hurriedly interrupted the argument between his parents, saying, “Hey! What does this have to do with me?! Why are you attack—”
“You shut up!” Pointing her chopsticks at Chen Yu, Mother Chen barked to Father Chen, “Why isn’t a single dog a dog? Wait, no… I mean, why isn’t Chen Yu a dog? Wait, no… What does our son have to do with dogs?! Why are you insulting dogs in our argument?! Wait, no…”
Chen Yu: “…”
Turning around, Chen Yu quietly left the kitchen and returned to his room. He then huddled in a corner of the room.
In the end, he spent an entire hour staring lifelessly at the wall.
At 9 A.M. sharp, a spatial vortex suddenly appeared inside his room.
Thud.
A long, white box fell onto the floor.
The fourth review product had arrived.
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